Properties of an engineer

Properties of a weird specie of people called ‘engineer’ -

1. He is found in varied professions banking, entertainment, media, advertising, Hotels. If you think he does only technical jobs, you are wrong. He can do anything; you just have to train him. Yes he is a threat to your job too. You can keep cribbing that he is wasting his degree doing other jobs, but secretly he doesn’t want to use his degree at all.
2. No. Pls don’t tell an engineer to repair your broken tap, mixer-grinder, car etc. He can exactly tell you how it works, but cannot tell why it doesn’t.
3. All engineers are not math-geniuses. Lot of them actually hate maths. It’s like a pill you don’t like but cant do without. He may very well solve complicated calculus equations, yet make silly mistakes in divisions and multiplications
4. He likes to complicate his life and try to find a complicated solution. This is how he feels, his degree was worth of everything he had sacrificed in life. Do not teach him common sense. That’s the last thing he would like to use.
5. He will always pretend to know more about gadgets than others, often fumes if a non-engineer knows more about gadgets than him.
6. He will leave no stone unturned to flaunt his engineering degree and to brag about it. Secretly he knows the only thing to flaunt about the degree is that engineers have evolved as people who can bear with any kind of academic torture.
7. Half of these species go abroad for further studies just because others are going, Lots of them get into IT,  other do courses which have no relation to engineering and the remaining few do actual technical jobs. Most of the times, the last herd are the most satisfied lot.
8. Female species are often rare in engineering colleges, speaking to one of them is considered to be one of the biggest achievements. Guys having girl friends were given demi-god status and were often consulted by the have-nots for tips. Very often these demi-gods were the best source of all information related to the better gender.
9. All those habits which make the boy a man are often introduced to and perfected in these 4 years.
10. ‘40’ is a special number. It is like the finishing line of a marathon for an engineering student. ‘All Clear’ - That’s what defines any successful engineering student. He strives to see that number on his mark list, and any shortage in that is multiplied with the worst swore words in any possible gaali encyclopaedia, often targeted to the professor who taught that subject, the examiner, the paper-setter, the invigilator who didn’t let him copy, the exam-neighbours, the cricket series, the crush and every one else who cleared the subject. Basically everyone except himself.
11. You have written as many pages of assignments that can bring down a forest. Every engineer is a skilled editor. The assignments of the one who can bring down a toppers assignment to an optimum minimum pages is a benchmark for all future manual Xerox copies of the same. Yet there is always scope of further reduction.
12. The humble scientific calculator suddenly becomes a device with usages even the inventor wouldnt have imagined in his wildest dreams. It becomes a secret message device, the storage device for formulas/important values for exams, the boredom killer in lectures.
13. Has often being taught important definitions in local language by professors.
14. Has weird usage of words, even in normal circumstances. This blog title is one such example.
15. He might have spent the most torturous academic years of his life doing engineering, he actually starts living after his engineering. Yet he will cherish it as the best years of his life.